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January 20, 2005

Mocking Rolling Stone Magazine? I'm on it!

Powerline has asked for "Cover of the Rolling Stone" parodies to address the fact that Rolling Stone has refused to run an ad for a youth-friendly edition of the Bible. They asked for a verse; I've gone one better and done the whole song. You'll note that not all the lines scan perfectly; they didn't in the original song, either. It's elastic that way. (Note: The original song lyrics are here, along with an instrumental MIDI file in case you're overcome with a desire to sing aloud. The MIDI plays automatically, so be warned.)

'Tween the Covers of the Rolling Stone
(apologies to Shel Silverstein, Dr. Hook, and the entire Medicine Show, wherever they may be.)

Now Jesus was a freak
Loved the poor and the weak
He walked barefoot through the Holy Land
Jann Wenner's the guy a
Generation called "messiah"
So you know that Jann, he understands
If Jesus doesn't reach you,
Jann will gladly teach you
Of the evils of conformity
He's an enfant terr-I-ble,
So he'll never let a Bible
'Tween the covers of the Rolling Stone.


(Rolling Stone)
Don't'cha look for the Bible 'tween the covers
(... Stone)
Gotta show that we're still subversive mothers!
(... Stone)
We don't want no Red State readers
'Tween the covers of the Rolling Stone!


In the '60s we were hip
Made your square parents flip
And our writers got their chicks for free
In the '80s our ad brains
Thought us up a campaign
About "perception" and "reality"
We don't want to be told
We're outdated and old
We'll reinvent ourselves again, you'll see
We've had many a revival
But we'll never let a Bible
'Tween the covers of the Rolling Stone.


(Rolling Stone)
Don't'cha look for the Bible 'tween the covers
(... Stone)
Gotta show that we're still subversive mothers!
(... Stone)
We don't want no Red State readers
'Tween the covers of the Rolling Stone!


Now we're all cosmic dancers
Just-a lookin' for the A.N.S.W.E.R.
And we're proud of our open minds
Maybe Marx is the way
Maybe Allah -- who can say?
As Buddha said, "Seek and ye shall find!"
The one place we'd never look
Is in the so-called "Good Book"
'Cause it's just bourgeois philosophy
It stops just short of libel
To suggest we'd put a Bible
'Tween the covers of the Rolling Stone.


(Rolling Stone)
Don't'cha look for the Bible 'tween the covers
(... Stone)
Gotta show that we're still subversive mothers!
(... Stone)
We don't want no Red State readers
'Tween the covers of the Rolling Stone!


Perhaps this will help make up to the Powerlineblog folks for the fact that their anagram just isn't going well. As some of you will recall, I was able to tell the entire Rathergate story using only anagrams of "Instapundit" and again using only anagrams of "Little Green Footballs". Powerline deserves an anagram narrative, but what can I say? They should have named their blog something with an "a" in it. Nevertheless, I have some anagrams, which I'll post soon. They just won't make a coherent narrative. Ah, well.

Update: Welcome, Powerline readers! Check out some of the recent entries to your right, make yourselves at home.

Posted by EtherPundit at January 20, 2005 06:47 PM   Category: Mockery

Comments

OUTSTANDING!! Bravo on your Cover of On the Cover ... Excellent work!

Posted by: Les at January 21, 2005 01:19 AM

Wonderful!! Good job!

Posted by: Don at January 21, 2005 04:42 PM

Wodnreful explanation of facts available here.

Posted by: Julissa at September 28, 2012 05:30 PM